Remembering My Friend Holly

Holly L. Lawson  1978 – 2020

Her name – Holly L. Lawson.
A beautiful southern girl with the cutest accent, smart, perky, funny, an advocate, a blogger, and with an attitude that always reminded me that no matter what I was going through, it was going to be all OK.

We talked about everything and anything.  We touch on the way we felt about certain things, her cervical cancer diagnosis, which was the same as mine, and the reasons we both became advocates.  We were quite different, yet quite similar – if you can believe that.   

Can you believe I never met Holly in person? Yup, I never did.  Yet, I can describe her personality so well.  Holly and I used to talk for hours on the phone or Face-time each other quite often. Every time we started to talk we use to say that we were not going to stay long on the phone or Face-time.  That never happened. 😆

I am a story teller, yet to tell Holly and my story has taken me awhile. I did not feel quite ready until now.  It is 4 months since Holly left this world, and I am sure that everyone in the Cervivor® community has a story to tell about Holly, she touched all of us, and many other people she came in contact with, in a special way, but this story is all mine and hers.

I got to know Holly a little better as we both were co-administrators of the FB page Survivor Slimdown, powered by Cervivor®. Survivor Slimdown is an online group aimed to support ALL CANCER survivors in their fight to live a healthy and balanced lifestyle after a cancer diagnosis.   As cancer survivors we struggled to improve our health.  Holly struggled with secondary effects from her cancer treatments.  This became troublesome for her, but she was a fighter and always had that instinct to fight with whatever card she was dealt with.

We always made plans to meet personally.  I live in NYC and she was in Texas.  There were three different occasions that I can remember that we actually were suppose to meet, but unfortunately the universe never came together for us.  Every time we made plans, something happened with her health, and the doctor would recommend not to travel. We never gave up though.  We use to say “we are going to make it happen.” 

I can go on and on, and write many pages about Holly and myself, but I won’t.  After lots of struggle with her health, cancer came back.  This time it took a toll, but she held on and fought to the very end.

Before she left, I had made one last attempt to go see her while in hospice.  I wanted to surprised her, and I made arrangements to be there by March 25, 2020.  I had every intention to fly to her, unfortunately she passed away on March 13, 2020.  I never got to see her and actually say good-bye in person, and thank her for being her, for being my friend, for making me laugh, for coming into my life and making it that much better.

I take comfort in the many memories I shared with her, and in the many conversations we had.  She made me feel special, she pointed out things in me that I would never have seen.  She pushed me to start an e-book on my story, making me promise her for her, to be the first one to read it.  I am so sorry that she will not read it, but as I promised her – I will finish it for sure.

I miss her every day, but she lives in my heart.  Her footprint will be forever there.  Being an advocate, and a Cervivor® Ambassador was very important to her, as it is to me.  I will continue our mission.  I will continue to share her story, and do the work we often spoke about.

Rest in peace, and away from any pain my dear friend.   Sending you all of my love. I miss you so much Holly -💔